French woman confesses to killing 8 babies
-
Primula Baggins
- Living in hope
- Posts: 40005
- Joined: Mon Nov 21, 2005 1:43 am
- Location: Sailing the luminiferous aether
- Contact:
This contraception thing? Is not utterly 100% reliable.
“There, peeping among the cloud-wrack above a dark tor high up in the mountains, Sam saw a white star twinkle for a while. The beauty of it smote his heart, as he looked up out of the forsaken land, and hope returned to him. For like a shaft, clear and cold, the thought pierced him that in the end the Shadow was only a small and passing thing: there was light and high beauty for ever beyond its reach.”
― J.R.R. Tolkien, The Return of the King
― J.R.R. Tolkien, The Return of the King
It is uncommon, maybe even rare, but not unheard of. Needless to say, I was surprised and my doctor was horrified. He had performed the tubal ligation almost exactly a year earlier. This was in 1976. I had 2 children, one 11 and one 5. I knew I was pregnant, as you do. No test needed for me, but the test was positive and I can still see my doctor sitting there shaking his head. "I don't perform abortions," he said, "but I can refer you to a doctor who does."Griffon64 wrote:Yi-yikes!vison wrote:I got pregnant after I had my tubes tied.
I've heard about vasectomies "reversing" themselves with the tubes regrowing, if they weren't properly tied off, but I'd imagine this would be even rarer.
I thought about it for about 5 seconds and said, "I don't want an abortion."
The doctor said, "But you had your tubes tied, that usually means you don't want any more children."
My mind was clear. "No," I said, "I guess this baby is serious about being born, considering everything."
So, okay. I went home and told my husband. We had our supper and were watching TV when a diaper commercial came on and he said, "I guess that's what we have to look forward to" and it went over me like a wave of cold water that I did NOT want another baby. It was an AWFUL feeling. I started to cry. This memory is so strong!
A couple of days passed and I was still miserable, hating the situation I was in and wondering if maybe abortion might be the answer, while all the time knowing I wasn't going to do it and yet thinking it might be wiser. Very confusing and troubling.
Then it was all rendered pointless because it turned out it was a tubal pregnancy and I came very, very, very close to dying because of it.
I have never forgotten the feelings I had. It was horrible. And yet I was a married woman in a stable relationship, well able to "afford" another child and no doubt would have been thrilled with the whole thing before the baby was 5 minutes old - I knew all that. I still didn't want another baby, even though I had chosen not to have an abortion.
So how can I, how COULD I, ever agree to laws that refuse other women the right to choose?
Dig deeper.
-
Hachimitsu
- Formerly Wilma
- Posts: 942
- Joined: Fri Dec 02, 2005 1:36 pm
- Location: Canada
- Contact:
Yikes!I don't even like to hold other peoples' babies. It seemed like every time I thought "Awwww, babies are nice" I'd get pregnant again. So, I've carefully avoided admiring babies for 20 years now, and the tubal ligation has been successful.
Last night, though, I picked up a baby and admired him and interacted with him.
I even got him to smile, even though he was really too young for it. 
If this causes a contraception failure, I'm going to be very annoyed.vison, I am highly upset that the good doctor didn't suspect a tubal pregnancy. Yes, people sometimes conceive after both vasectomies and tubal ligations, but it is FAR less likely that a tubal ligation will fail (and result in a normal pregnancy). Spermies are pretty little, and they can escape. Eggs are HUGE in comparison... they don't just slip by and happen to fall in the right place at the right time. Not too often.
All these stories because I was saying that people who have multiple abortions are not necessarily being cavalier about birth control. I think we've proved our point, here... seems like *I* was the only one to have an unplanned pregnancy because of lack of prevention. And it was just the once! It was!!
All these stories because I was saying that people who have multiple abortions are not necessarily being cavalier about birth control. I think we've proved our point, here... seems like *I* was the only one to have an unplanned pregnancy because of lack of prevention. And it was just the once! It was!!
"What do you fear, lady?" Aragorn asked.
"A cage," Éowyn said. "To stay behind bars, until use and old age accept them, and all chance of doing great deeds is gone beyond recall or desire.”
― J.R.R. Tolkien, The Return of the King
"A cage," Éowyn said. "To stay behind bars, until use and old age accept them, and all chance of doing great deeds is gone beyond recall or desire.”
― J.R.R. Tolkien, The Return of the King
Oh, it happened to me too. With my first. We were planning on it "soon", and had started getting a little too cavalier with the birth control, but when it happened the timing was very bad (I was about to go to Ecuador to climb a big mountain, tix bought, everything!). I thought about "taking care of the problem" and my husband gave me carte blanche if that was what I wanted to do....but I just couldn't.
My second was entirely planned.
My second was entirely planned.
Anthy, I only said that I knew everything about it, but not that I made use of my knowledge back then.Anthriel wrote:
All these stories because I was saying that people who have multiple abortions are not necessarily being cavalier about birth control. I think we've proved our point, here... seems like *I* was the only one to have an unplanned pregnancy because of lack of prevention. And it was just the once! It was!!
How beautiful a day can be when kindness touches it.
Aha! The truth comes out. 
It is amazing how many women just on this little board have had unplanned pregnancies, though. Extrapolate that to the Whole Rest of the World (and surely, all of them aren't as smart as all of us 
), and you can see how these issues can be Issues.
vison, I am glad, for your doctor's sake. Made me want to drive up there and smack him around (although I suppose something that happened in the 70's seems pretty far in the past). That's SCARY... tubal pregnancies certainly can be life threatening.
And I cried like a baby when I found out I was pregnant again (so soon!) after my first baby. I felt... stupid, and negligent, and overwhelmed. You know, I *do* know where babies come from, and yet I was pretty irresponsible about the whole thing.
My mother-in-law did not help the guilt factor when she berated me for getting pregnant again so fast (as if I were alone in that project): "your son will never have a normal childhood! You have robbed him of a normal childhood!!"
I remember sobbing over his crib, apologizing to him over and over. I'm sure all the hormones didn't help, but I just felt so BAD.
I'm not sure I ever really considered ending that pregnancy, but I can see where people would. All I know is that I am so glad I have my (little) girl. Sometimes things that seem awful turn out to be wonderful.
It is amazing how many women just on this little board have had unplanned pregnancies, though.
Extrapolate that to the Whole Rest of the World (and surely, all of them aren't as smart as all of us ), and you can see how these issues can be Issues.vison, I am glad, for your doctor's sake. Made me want to drive up there and smack him around (although I suppose something that happened in the 70's seems pretty far in the past). That's SCARY... tubal pregnancies certainly can be life threatening.
And I cried like a baby when I found out I was pregnant again (so soon!) after my first baby. I felt... stupid, and negligent, and overwhelmed. You know, I *do* know where babies come from, and yet I was pretty irresponsible about the whole thing.
My mother-in-law did not help the guilt factor when she berated me for getting pregnant again so fast (as if I were alone in that project): "your son will never have a normal childhood! You have robbed him of a normal childhood!!"
I remember sobbing over his crib, apologizing to him over and over. I'm sure all the hormones didn't help, but I just felt so BAD.
I'm not sure I ever really considered ending that pregnancy, but I can see where people would. All I know is that I am so glad I have my (little) girl. Sometimes things that seem awful turn out to be wonderful.
"What do you fear, lady?" Aragorn asked.
"A cage," Éowyn said. "To stay behind bars, until use and old age accept them, and all chance of doing great deeds is gone beyond recall or desire.”
― J.R.R. Tolkien, The Return of the King
"A cage," Éowyn said. "To stay behind bars, until use and old age accept them, and all chance of doing great deeds is gone beyond recall or desire.”
― J.R.R. Tolkien, The Return of the King
I didn't cry when I found out I was pregnant for the second time less than 6 months after giving birth. Within days of finding out I started paperwork for getting out of the Army, pushed it through as fast as I could, and in about a month I became a civilian again.
I was already getting too little sleep because of the first baby. I couldn't cope with the idea of 2 of them plus the long hours I had to work. Although the close pregnancies "ruined" my career, I got to see my older daughter's first steps at 8 months old. If I'd been a little slower pushing the paper, I'd have missed that. Working 12 hour days and frequent weekends was not conducive to any sort of quality family life.
So, close pregnancies caused a major change in plans for me, but all in all they were good changes.
I was already getting too little sleep because of the first baby. I couldn't cope with the idea of 2 of them plus the long hours I had to work. Although the close pregnancies "ruined" my career, I got to see my older daughter's first steps at 8 months old. If I'd been a little slower pushing the paper, I'd have missed that. Working 12 hour days and frequent weekends was not conducive to any sort of quality family life.
So, close pregnancies caused a major change in plans for me, but all in all they were good changes.
-
JewelSong
- Just Keep Singin'
- Posts: 4660
- Joined: Fri Dec 02, 2005 1:35 am
- Location: Boston, MA
- Contact:
When I was about 20 years old, my mother thought she was pregnant. She was about 44 at the time, but her periods were still like clockwork and she was more than 3 weeks late.
This was just about the time that home pregnancy tests were being sold, but you couldn't tell as early as you can now...so she had to wait almost 3 weeks before getting one. So there was plenty of time to think about "what if?"
As I recall, my father was kind of in shock/denial and didn't say much - but my Mom and I had several phone conversations about it. She said that she wasn't sure what she would do if the test was positive.
Well, the test was negative. My mother told me she ran around the house, whooping with joy...because after 4 kids, the youngest aged 14 and being 44 years old, she really did NOT want another child.
And then...then...she told me she sat down and started to cry. Because there wasn't going to be a baby. And somehow, someway, she had started to become ready for one.
I always wondered what it would have been like to have had a little sister or brother so much younger than me...and I remember being disappointed that it wasn't going to happen!
This was just about the time that home pregnancy tests were being sold, but you couldn't tell as early as you can now...so she had to wait almost 3 weeks before getting one. So there was plenty of time to think about "what if?"
As I recall, my father was kind of in shock/denial and didn't say much - but my Mom and I had several phone conversations about it. She said that she wasn't sure what she would do if the test was positive.
Well, the test was negative. My mother told me she ran around the house, whooping with joy...because after 4 kids, the youngest aged 14 and being 44 years old, she really did NOT want another child.
And then...then...she told me she sat down and started to cry. Because there wasn't going to be a baby. And somehow, someway, she had started to become ready for one.
I always wondered what it would have been like to have had a little sister or brother so much younger than me...and I remember being disappointed that it wasn't going to happen!
"Live! Live! Live! Life is a banquet, and most poor suckers are starving to death!" - Auntie Mame
I know exactly what your mother felt, because I felt the same way. And if my pregnancy had ended in a baby instead of as it did, that baby would be 34 this summer. I sometimes think about it. Not very often, but right now I am.JewelSong wrote:Because there wasn't going to be a baby. And somehow, someway, she had started to become ready for one.
Dig deeper.